I suppose if you read this, you've probably noticed that there hasn't been much here this month. Oh, I have the usual end-of-school-year stresses, and some unpleasantness at work that is best (for professional reasons) not shared here. Not that I think anyone would look here, but, you know, it's a public forum, and so we keep our professional manners. Yeah.
Really, though, that hasn't been the reason for not writing. Every evening, I check out those blogs I like to read, think about adding more, or checking out recommendations, and then, when it comes time to click on the "new post" button, I just don't.
I'm thinking. Thinking about the writing, and the what I want out of it, and the purpose for doing it so other people can see... even if not that many people care about seeing. I'm getting to a new point in the writing. Growing is good, but there are choices to be made, and agonized over, evidently. I'm on that brink of making some connections, and I like it, but.... I'm shy. Well, that isn't it, exactly, but it is the essential translation. Do I have enough to say? Are there people who will care what I have to say? Who will join the conversation? Do I even want to know what all of them will say?
I should plan! I should have something to say ALL the time. Something that is witty, and stylish, and geeky and... well, already, that's a lot to live up to, and my jaw starts tightening. It's kind of like when you are standing at the edge of the pool (or maybe the edge of the high dive), looking into the deep water, scary and exciting, and counting.