No. REALLY seeing it. Understanding the refractive qualities of the atmosphere on the light. You know, more inner truth. For myself.
Deep breath in.... deep breath out.
When I had my check up in the fall, my blood sugar was up higher than my doctor liked it to be. Frankly, I had been doing rather poorly on my diet, so I wasn't surprised. OK, well, maybe a little, because I was fooling myself that I was doing better than I really was. I hadn't gained weight so... I splurged now and then. Yeah, more frequently than I should. So he gave me another pill to take with the Januvia. Well, it caused my ankles to swell. Side effect. And I already have problems with my ankles swelling. As wide as my feet are, I could seriously run out of shoe options. Really.
OK, I told myself, I will eat better, and exercise more. And I have. I started swimming a couple of times a week, and it felt great. Then, came the first sinus infection of the season, and antibiotics. Then, the second... with tonsilitis. This one set me back a little because I didn't want to get in the pool with it, and when I was better, the pool was closed for almost a week because of the weather. Finally I got back to the pool, which I feel is better overall exercise for me, and less stress on joints etc. Besides, I like to swim. But now, I'm slowly feeling icky again. chest, this time, and a growing cough.
I feel like it is another wake up call for me. I better (as I've said I should before) get (and STAY) real with myself again. Some more. I need to be diligent about what I eat. I need to exercise, and not just the days I go to the pool, but EVERY day. I've figured out where a mile is, here in my neighborhood. I'll walk the half for the next week, and then go to the mile. The days are growing longer, so the evening will just about keep me in the light. Its a journey, folks, and I know I'm not the only one taking it.